3B

I am obsessed with their whole self-titled album.

Advertisements

It always creeps back up

It seems my anxiety is coming back. I worry when I have nothing to worry about.
It doesn’t help that I stay home a lot, locked in my room binge watching Netflix.
Im worried that I’ll have a panic attack. I’m getting anxiety about getting anxiety.
I’m going to a party tomorrow with someone from school. Maybe it’ll help get my mind off of things…or maybe it will make things worse.
It’s hard to understand that nothing is wrong and you’re going to be okay.
Two years ago I was going through the hardest time of my (short) life. I was having constant panic attacks and at one point I was having suicidal thoughts. I never did anything but I strongly considered it. I felt like I couldn’t talk to anyone, I felt truly alone. I thought I was going crazy. I didn’t tell anyone what I was going through and no one really noticed because I tried to hide it.
Talking about what I went through at the time hurts and there’s still so much more aspects involved. I feel like it was so long ago. I rarely ever think back to that time because it’s all kind of a blur.
Although it’s hard to talk about a dark time in my life I think it helped me today. It helped me understand that things get better.
They always do.

image

A blog…really?

What the hell is someone even supposed to put on their first blog post.

I wonder how I got here and well it all started because I felt lonely. Then, of course, I went to my safe haven: the good old world wide web. I searched ‘I feel like I have no one to talk to’ on google (is it just me or can the urge to search everything on google really take over you?) and then I somehow ended up with a blog.

I don’t really know anything about blogging except for the few that I used to read in my good old baking days. However, those were food blogs and this…this a personal blog. Is that what you call this? Diary blog. Journal blog.

So my purpose in making this blog thing was to feel less alone and help others feel less alone. Although I do doubt anyone will read this. Anyway, I’m here.